My last post was about my son being robbed and assaulted on his way home from school. Since that post the kid who assaulted him has plead guilty to felony robbery and will be sentenced next week. In the mean time he was placed in an alternative school but is still out running around doing [...]
I haven’t had the energy to post in ages. My kids are driving me F**cking CRAZY!!!!! I sit on the sofa drooling, staring at nothing and every few minutes scream – “Go to BED!!!” Yesterday my 6 year old daughter started a 3 hour brawl after she turned off her brothers video game because “He was annoying me” that ended in all three little hellions being banished to separate rooms.
I’ve been watching marathons of supernanny trying to figure out how I’m supposed to get them to shut the f***ck up and keep their f**cking hands to themselves – but I just end up blaming myself for not raising kids who don’t want to kill each other 23 hours a day. Should I get rid of the video games? HELL NO!!!! That’s the only time they shut up. Why does every other adult they come in contact with think they are perfect little angels?
I get up at 4 AM to get to the Gym at 5 AM and work out my frustration so I don’t whoop their butts during the day, but last Monday, I walked out the front door and tripped over one of those stupid pop-up sprinkler thingies and fell flat on my face, HARD – took all the skin off of both of my knees and haven’t been able to bend my knees in a week. Now I’m even meaner and crankier (poor kids). I need to get one of those Indiana Jones whips and just sit here on the sofa and . . .w h o o o o o o s h . . . . . smack . . . .crack!!
BUT WAIT – there’s hope – the two older boys will be shipped off to New York for a couple weeks at the end of July to hang out with their Aunt (my sister) – She owns a kennel in a cool little town called Millbrook, New York. She’s my older sister, never married – her kids are her goats, chickens, horses and dogs. She’ll keep them busy and they will have so much fun. And I, home with one kid, will, FINALLY have some peace and quiet. (who the hell am I kidding – Laila already has a list – YES a real list of everything she wants to do – from going to the beach, to going to the mall, movies, zoo, etc.
It seems I’m not alone in my parental misery. I came across a wonderful book, by Adam Mansbach called “Go the F**CK to Sleep”. I haven’t laughed so hard in ages (especially with Samuel L. Jackson Narrating). Maybe I’m not crazy.
The little cheeky book was born out of frustration. Adam Mansbach, author of such dramatic novels as The End of Jews and the upcoming Nature of the Beast, had a really hard time putting his 2-year-old daughter Vivien to bed.
One day last year, after chatting about his problem with some friends, he wrote a Facebook post: “Look out for my forthcoming children’s book, Go the F— to Sleep.’’
“It was just me messing around,’’ says Mansbach from Berkeley, Calif., where he is based. “I had no intention of writing the book. I knew the [concept] was funny, but I never could have anticipated this kind of passionate response.’’
Vivien is an easier child now. “It’s no longer the battle it once was,’’ says Mansbach, who remembers a time when it would take two hours, starting at 7 p.m., for the toddler to nod off. (He adds that his wife took on the majority of nighttime duties.)
“The mistake I would consistently make, out of sheer exhaustion, was to try to leave the room early,’’ explains Mansbach, 35. “The breathing would start to get kind of heavy, that type of thing. So I would play these games with myself: ‘OK, I’ll count to 30. If she hasn’t moved, I am going to slowly ease my way out.
“I would always jump the gun. I’d be just out the door and she’d sit straight up in bed, and say, ‘Poppa, poppa! Where are you going?’ ’’
Mansbach, who grew up in the Boston area, realized he was not alone.
“Getting kids to sleep is maybe the biggest single issue,’’ he says. “Parents have problems with eating well and behavior and how long it takes to get them out of the house. But this is worldwide.’’
The lushly illustrated book is even popular with kids.
“A lot of people found that their children enjoyed this story of a battle of a mischievous kid who wins the battle with his parents,’’ says the author, who suggests replacing the word “moon’’ for the F-bomb. “They get it.’’
Read more: http://www.miamiherald.com/2011/07/07/2302441/speaking-to-the-author-of-go-to.html#ixzz1Rky2jMRV
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